So I went up to Duluth this weekend, as my stepbrother Jeff was in town. Soon to be divorced, Jeff was ready to hit it (the bottle, that is) with his brother Brian and their wayward sister Diane. Not to be left out, we invited baby brother Nathan, who turns 23 today. But I digress.
Getting the party started at The Reef (I shit you not, it's really called that) in Duluth, I graciously offer to sober-cab my louts of brothers around for the evening. Let the drinking progress.
First, the Vikings lost. Dammit!
Then, we lost Jeff's stepdad at one of the bars we went to. Now, it takes some doing to lose a 50-ish guy at a college bar, but he was MIA for a good 30 minutes. No clue where he went, but I suspect he hightailed it to a different bar for a decent snifter of brandy.
Finally, the coup de grace, the boys insist that I need to go to the 'Toga. Yup, that's the Saratoga, infamous strip club of the greater Duluth area.
Nothing says family togetherness than putting $1's in a g-string with your brothers. Manda, I have to say it's a worthy sibling bonding exercise...just a suggestion. But please, be drunk enough to swear it didn't happen or that you weren't at fault. In my case, I plead no contest. I was curious to see what it's like.
And with that skanky memory burned into my brain for all time, I leave you.
2 comments:
Ok. First - did we know about your brother? I'm sorry about that and I hope he is doing alright.
Secondly - I have had similar experiences with the male family contingent. While in NYC for the wedding, we - which includes my brothers, cousins, cousin's future (at the time) husband and a random spattering of other his friends - went to Coyote Ugly. Not quite as skanked out as an all out strip club but pretty close. It really isn't like the movie. Its much smaller and they are much sluttier. Boobs everywhere. Bartender-on-bartender action. Random drunk girls topless on the bar. My cousin's wife and myself being the responsible girls we are paid for our shirts "I danced on the bar at Coyote Ugly" rather than strip for them. I mean really, I'm there with family. Gross. But that is the closest i want to come to sharing that kind of experience with my family members. There were a few moments when it was completely twilight zone.
You are a good sister to support your brothers during an adventure like this. Oh wait - and you were the sober one? You are an amazing sister.
Suddenly I don't feel so bad about being drunk off our asses hauling my 9 year old sister out of bed to tease her about boys and force licorice down her throat AFTER SHE'S BRUSHED HER TEETH.
Way to go! Was that your first time in a strip club? I'm amazed you made it this long.
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