Why Cars Suck: An Ode to Suck-dom
by Diane Dugas
You run for a while,
you big shitty pile,
and then
you just break on down.
You were crusing just fine
through so many county lines
why then
did you have to break down?
As soon as I thought I was home free
you, my car, said, "nuh-uh, it's not to be!"
And sputtered to a halt
amid snow, dirt and salt
right there on 35-E. (well, it was 35-W, but that doesn't rhyme with anything)
So I cruised off the road, almost into a ditch,
and called my Uncle Mitch.
Who came
with a gas can for me.
Alas, it wasn't the gas
the engine just wouldn't last
So we called
a tow truck instead.
The car's now in the shop
the bill's going to pop
my eyes
right outta my head.
I picked up a rental
and am trying not to go mental
but my mind
keeps on thinking, "For real?!"
So I am waiting to hear
from my mechanic so dear
who will call
soon to tell me the deal.
In the meantime dear clan
I am without Grand Am
it's a sad, sad, sad
state of affairs.
My thoughts of a spa day
or a trip to somewhere far away
are subsumed now
by the cost of car repairs.
Monday, December 29, 2008
Monday, December 08, 2008
Evan David
Evan David was baptized last Saturday, November 29th, surrounded by family and friends. He was a complete trooper through the entire process, barely even making a face when anointed and vigorously rubbed dry. What a guy!!
Auntie Di and Auntie Amanda were on hand to proudly bear witness.
(We missed you, Auntie Nat!)
It still boggles my mind that one of my best friends is a mom.
Holy scha-moly!!
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Adventures on the Western Front
Hello all from Great Falls, Montana!
I made it out here on Saturday, after attending Geb's little boy's baptism (pics and post to follow soon). Our flight didn't leave until 9:15 CST, so we didn't get out here until 11:30 MST. I was a pooped puppy - way past my bedtime!! And, strangely, traveling always makes me tired. I don't get it - I'm just sitting there, right? But sleepiness abounded nonetheless.
We had a full day to "play" when we got here. Sunday found us on our way down the road to Belt, MT, and tiny podunk that boasts its own post office, a few bars, some churches, and not much else. Now, you know I didn't go for church, and the post office isn't open on Sunday. So... you guessed it, bar time!
Linda & I enjoyed the local fare at the Harvest Moon Brewery. Delicious brewed beverages and, I swear, the best darn cheeseburger I've had in a long time!! (Oh, and our waitress was from MN! How random is that?) I tried the Harvest Moon Select, Harvest Moon Pale Beltian, and something called "Charlie Red." All good, baby, all good.
Monday and Tuesday were hard-core studying days, and Wednesday a super-review day. We had a small group (5 counselors & one educator) and really hit the books. The test, supposedly very rigorous, would be set up for Thursday as soon as we got our HUD agency number from our boss back in MN.
We studied charts, tables, definitions, etc. We did word problems to learn practical application of various formulas and terms. We filled in blank spreadsheets with product-specific items. My head ached, but it started to set in. Flashbacks to college abounded.
Lo and behold, the boss back in MN didn't get the HUD agency number to get us registered for the test. So, our educator tried to register Linda and I as employees at his agency. The testing center didn't care, which was good. Linda got the 2:30 slot on Thursday in Helena, MT (the nearest site).
But me - nada. They have no more spots available. Unless I want to stay in Helena, MT another week (no can do).
So. A summary:
1) I took a short Thanksgiving weekend at the last minute to come out here. Did not go to Duluth, did not see immediate family.
2) I took a full week off at TCF to come out here (lost earnings for which I will not get reimbursed).
3) I studied my ass off for the past three days.
4) Now I can't take the test as planned, will have to set it up somewhere else (God knows where) and some other time (again, will likely miss work). And, to top it off, I'll probably have forgotten half of what I crammed in this week.
Not a happy Di. My boss that's here with me, Linda, not a happy Linda. Grrrrrrrr.
Hopefully I'll find a test site near the Twin Cities and a date and time that isn't too inconvenient. Keep your fingers crossed.
I made it out here on Saturday, after attending Geb's little boy's baptism (pics and post to follow soon). Our flight didn't leave until 9:15 CST, so we didn't get out here until 11:30 MST. I was a pooped puppy - way past my bedtime!! And, strangely, traveling always makes me tired. I don't get it - I'm just sitting there, right? But sleepiness abounded nonetheless.
We had a full day to "play" when we got here. Sunday found us on our way down the road to Belt, MT, and tiny podunk that boasts its own post office, a few bars, some churches, and not much else. Now, you know I didn't go for church, and the post office isn't open on Sunday. So... you guessed it, bar time!
Linda & I enjoyed the local fare at the Harvest Moon Brewery. Delicious brewed beverages and, I swear, the best darn cheeseburger I've had in a long time!! (Oh, and our waitress was from MN! How random is that?) I tried the Harvest Moon Select, Harvest Moon Pale Beltian, and something called "Charlie Red." All good, baby, all good.
Monday and Tuesday were hard-core studying days, and Wednesday a super-review day. We had a small group (5 counselors & one educator) and really hit the books. The test, supposedly very rigorous, would be set up for Thursday as soon as we got our HUD agency number from our boss back in MN.
We studied charts, tables, definitions, etc. We did word problems to learn practical application of various formulas and terms. We filled in blank spreadsheets with product-specific items. My head ached, but it started to set in. Flashbacks to college abounded.
Lo and behold, the boss back in MN didn't get the HUD agency number to get us registered for the test. So, our educator tried to register Linda and I as employees at his agency. The testing center didn't care, which was good. Linda got the 2:30 slot on Thursday in Helena, MT (the nearest site).
But me - nada. They have no more spots available. Unless I want to stay in Helena, MT another week (no can do).
So. A summary:
1) I took a short Thanksgiving weekend at the last minute to come out here. Did not go to Duluth, did not see immediate family.
2) I took a full week off at TCF to come out here (lost earnings for which I will not get reimbursed).
3) I studied my ass off for the past three days.
4) Now I can't take the test as planned, will have to set it up somewhere else (God knows where) and some other time (again, will likely miss work). And, to top it off, I'll probably have forgotten half of what I crammed in this week.
Not a happy Di. My boss that's here with me, Linda, not a happy Linda. Grrrrrrrr.
Hopefully I'll find a test site near the Twin Cities and a date and time that isn't too inconvenient. Keep your fingers crossed.
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